Raising Children

[Sunny]

I've heard you talk about your current house & it sounds like you've got it pretty good right now.

[~Daisy~]

I do like it. Its tough when you catch the "grass is greener" bug, though. I have some great photos I took in our back yard yesterday, and one would wonder why I'd ever think I wanted to move. I did like the porch on that one house, but when looked up close, it was in pretty crappy shape. It had a cement floor and was barely a step up from just being all the way outside. The neat thing was the inside walls were log cabin-y, from what I could tell peering in the windows.

[Sunny]

I'm sure something will come along later in life that has "that feel"...more of what you want in a dream house.

That's the great thing about being this age -- there's so much left to do!

[~Daisy~]

That's true. And I don't think my children would accept a change of homes right now. This has been the only home that they've known (when AJ -4- was born, we lived in an apartment in Indianapolis, but we moved into our house when he was about 5 months old, so everything he's done has been in that house: first steps, first foods, first birthday...)

We did discuss finally repainting the dining room this upcoming weekend. I laughed hysterically, because so far we have not agreed on a color and that's why its still the way it is now. I want light browns and deep mulled wine reds as an accent. He thinks that it might be too dark for that room.

[Sunny]

That would be hard. We've been quite nomadic (not intentionally), so my oldest daughter has lived in 3 different places during her short life. However, she's ESTATIC about have a new room all to herself...in a nice shade of pink. 

And what you're talking about -- those are the "in" colors right now...or so it seems. My aunt just painted her (small) kitchen nutmeg & wine...she loves it.

[~Daisy~]

YES! Exactly! These colors had food names, too, but I can't remember. Seems like one was Spice Cake or something.

[Sunny]

Sure could go for a slice of that right now.

[kerrybeth]

Sherwin Williams Gourmet mushroom is a great paint color. 

[Sunny]

What color does it resemble? I'm looking for a grayish-taupe color for my family room-to-be.

[kerrybeth]

No gray. Just a really pretty khaki color. Sounds like you are looking for a taupe.

[Cookie Parker]

Although not a panacea, my Grandmother used to say "Raise your children so that others want to be around them."  So, of course, this included lessons in "polite". 

But you can't just ask a children to follow rules without examples.  My husband and I are polite with each other.  So the children would just follow suit.  When we were around family, we'd continue and talk with family and interact.  We did everything with our children, as well.  Vacations were geard for them, although we usually just visited family.  We went to races and the children were included and interacted with during the race. 

I think focusing on children as the center and setting examples is what we did most.  Oh, and figuring out what worked for discipline.  And as you said, Ms Mojo, different ages required different means.  But maintaining consistency was the greatest lesson.

[Sandy Eggo]

But you can't just ask a children to follow rules without examples. 

I agree with this. Sometimes parents use the "do as I say and not as I do" philosophy on things. IMHO they are basically implying that there are two sets of rules for things such as responsiblity, honesty, manners, etc. I think it sends a mixed message and confuses the children.

[Sunny]

Ghosts and/or imaginary friends seen by children.

My daughter has been waking up at night & telling me she sees ghosts in her room. My husband & I disagree on what to tell her or how to comfort her.

What are your thoughts & experiences? 

[Sandy Eggo]

Wow! I have three different experiences with that. When I was growing up I used to wake up to ghosts and my mom told me to sing, "Jesus" loves me.

My son had a similar experience and I gave him a charm that his late grandmother had given me and told him that would give him comfort and encourage the "bad guys",  he called them, to go away. It worked.

My daughter, I did a dance each evening to keep the monsters away and it worked. I looked ridiculous, but it worked.

I guess it depends on how you feel about ghosts. My mom was very spiritual and believed in the spirit world, but she believed their purpose was positive. I didn't really view it as a negative thing until I was older and able to see the "hollywood" version. I think even if I didn't think they are real, I'd be hesitant to tell her that, because to her they are.  That's why I used methods above to plant the suggestion that we have something stronger than "monsters" or "bad guys". Eventually, they forgot about it.

[Sunny]

I have very mixed feelings about the spiritual world...leaning more towards the "believer" side, but still uncertain about approaching the issue with a 4 year-old. Thank you for sharing all 3 of these experiences...they are all consistent with my husband's mindset. He told her that they are friendly and to not be afraid of them. He also saw "spirits" as a child, reportedly, and was told something similar.

I think I'll be investing in some "monster spray" if she wakes up again at 3:00am.