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because i feel like looking at myself...

Started by ~vxn~, January 09, 2007, 01:32:25 PM

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Exterminator

#45
January 17, 2007, 03:44:46 PM
Actually, I'm pretty sure you can (unless you like 'em noodly).

RAmen.
Arguing with Christians is like playing chess with a pigeon.  No matter how good I am at chess, the pigeon is just going to knock over the pieces, shit on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

The truth is slow, but relentless. Over time it becomes irresistible.

~Daisy~

#46
January 17, 2007, 04:04:55 PM
Wow...I just cannot believe how crappy and mean some parents are. I had such a normal, boring childhood.  My husband, on the other hand, lived a complete opposite, much more like yours, vxn. I've heard some of his stories and they just make me think WTF is wrong with people? I'm afraid to even raise my voice at my kids in front of him, for fear I'll trigger some repressed memory for him.

He's told me a lot more of his stories as time has gone on...and I've encouraged him to write them down. He's hidden many of them away and when they sneak up to remind him, they really bother him. I've seen him go in to some very scary, dark places inside.

I bought him the book "Running with Scissors," unsure if it was a wise decision. It could go one of two ways: It could be helpful for him to see that he wasn't alone in his miserable youth, OR it could send him off to that dark place. Luckily it seems to so far be a good thing for him.

And what's worse is, what do you say to that? I'm sorry you had a bad childhood? It doesn't seem genuine, when in fact it is. I'm sorry you and so many others had sucky parents.

If you don't like what you're doing, you can always pick up your needle and move to another groove.
--Timothy Leary

Sunny

#47
January 17, 2007, 04:10:30 PM
That's a nice way to put it, Daisy...afterall, we didn't choose who are parents were...or did we?

A similar tragic book about child abuse is, "A Child Called "It": One Child's Courage to Survive" by Dave Pelzer.

It really puts things into perspective.

Sandy Eggo

#48
January 17, 2007, 06:20:25 PM
Quote from: SunnyInFL on January 17, 2007, 04:10:30 PM
That's a nice way to put it, Daisy...afterall, we didn't choose who are parents were...or did we?

A similar tragic book about child abuse is, "A Child Called "It": One Child's Courage to Survive" by Dave Pelzer.

It really puts things into perspective.

I couldn't finish it.  :no:
Only after the last tree has been cut down. Only after the last river has been poisoned. Only after the last fish has been caught. Only then will you find that money cannot be eaten. - -Cree Indian Prophecy

"Women who strive to be equal to men lack ambitition" -- anonymous

Sunny

#49
January 18, 2007, 07:55:28 AM
It is pretty explicit...pulls at your heartstrings...I believe he wrote other(s) after it, as well.

~Daisy~

#50
January 18, 2007, 10:48:15 AM
Hmm, sounds like something I might pre-read and if its good I'll give it to Aaron. I was hesitant to even let him read Running with Scissors.
If you don't like what you're doing, you can always pick up your needle and move to another groove.
--Timothy Leary

DrtyDeedsDunDrtChp

#51
January 21, 2007, 12:56:02 PM
Quote from: Exterminator on January 15, 2007, 08:23:43 PM
My dad was just a drunk who'd beat up the whole family when he was on a roll.  I was in accelerated classes in school so his reasoning for hitting me went something like, "And you...you think you're so smart..."  My mom worked as a nurse's aide and I don't even know how many times I saw her face bloodied and the front of yet another uniform shirt ruined.  Of course, he was always apologetic the next day...

Statistically, I should be like him but I chose to be the end to that cycle...I have never nor would I strike a woman and have no patience for those who would.

The last time I saw him was in a bar where my girlfriend at the time was a bartender.  It was New Years and I was there with friends.  He passed out and fell off of his bar stool.  I helped him to a cab and sent him home...turned out his neck was broken from the fall.  We never spoke again.

That girlfriend I lived with for many years; her father was also an abuser but he didn't even have alcohol as an excuse.  He shocked his children with a TV tube tester and used them for his sexual gratification.  I suspected for years what she had been through but she tried to repress it for the longest time.  Even when it surfaced, she was unwilling to undergo counseling for any length of time since that required admitting to and reliving the abuse.  It's a truly ugly part of the human condition...

You might consider ongoing counseling; we would all like to believe that we're strong enough to deal with these things ourselves...we were kids; that expectation might be less than reasonable.

Exterminator, I have a whole new respect for you after reading this post.

Exterminator

#52
January 22, 2007, 06:22:41 PM
Thanks but being a victim of an abusive father doesn't make me a hero any more than growing up in a succession of foster homes makes me a good prospect in a long term relationship.
Arguing with Christians is like playing chess with a pigeon.  No matter how good I am at chess, the pigeon is just going to knock over the pieces, shit on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

The truth is slow, but relentless. Over time it becomes irresistible.

awol

#53
January 22, 2007, 06:30:22 PM
Quote from: Exterminator on January 22, 2007, 06:22:41 PM
Thanks but being a victim of an abusive father doesn't make me a hero any more than growing up in a succession of foster homes makes me a good prospect in a long term relationship.

it gives you the potential to be though.

be a better man than he was.

it gets me through.
"Those who dance are considered insane by those who can't hear the music." - George Carlin

Exterminator

#54
January 22, 2007, 06:42:40 PM
Quote from: awol on January 22, 2007, 06:30:22 PM
it gives you the potential to be though.

be a better man than he was.

Also no great accomplishment when the bar is set so low.
Arguing with Christians is like playing chess with a pigeon.  No matter how good I am at chess, the pigeon is just going to knock over the pieces, shit on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

The truth is slow, but relentless. Over time it becomes irresistible.

~vxn~

#55
January 22, 2007, 08:11:46 PM
there are many ppl who have not been as fortunate as some when it comes to surviving this type of thing.  not to mention that it is a vicious cycle--and one that is not always easy to break. 

though--the experience does build character.... 
don't threaten me with a good time.

Exterminator

#56
January 23, 2007, 10:18:17 AM
Quote from: ~vxn~ on January 22, 2007, 08:11:46 PM
though--the experience does build characters.... 

FTFY! (fixed this for you!)   :biggrin:
Arguing with Christians is like playing chess with a pigeon.  No matter how good I am at chess, the pigeon is just going to knock over the pieces, shit on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

The truth is slow, but relentless. Over time it becomes irresistible.

~vxn~

#57
January 23, 2007, 08:10:37 PM
lmfao.... way to go.... lol...
don't threaten me with a good time.

American_Woman

#58
February 20, 2007, 06:48:18 PM
Quote from: ~vxn~ on January 09, 2007, 09:11:09 PM
what the hell is wrong with my face?  i blame my health for sh!tty pix, maybe it's just my sh!tty face i should blame... (laughing so hard at that.... lol... wtf... lolololol.... i need to lay off the sauce...)






To be quite honest I like the pic. It shows a little playful with a twist of I dare you to try and handle me. Good job. :smile:
What doesn't kill me only makes me stronger or can be postponed while I eat chocolate!

American_Woman

#59
February 20, 2007, 06:48:48 PM
Quote from: ~vxn~ on January 09, 2007, 01:32:25 PM


This pick should be on the cover of a magazine. It's pretty. :smile:
What doesn't kill me only makes me stronger or can be postponed while I eat chocolate!
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