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HAPPY THANKSGIVING

Started by Anne, November 23, 2011, 02:30:48 PM

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Anne

November 23, 2011, 02:30:48 PM

Hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving tomorrow.


A man named John got a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and worse vocabulary.

Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to 'clean up' the bird's vocabulary.

Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot. The parrot got angrier and even more rude. John in desperation, threw up his hands, grabbed the bird and threw him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quite. Not a peep for over a minute.

Fearing he had hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out of the freezer onto John's outstretched arms and said "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior."

John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude.

As he was about to ask what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird spoke-up, softly, "May I ask what the turkey did?"

HAPPY THANKSGIVING, EVERYONE!
"A discontented man will find no easy chair." Ben Franklin

damfast

#1
November 23, 2011, 06:53:29 PM
hahaha!!!
happy thanksgiving!!!!

hugs to all my pals!!!!!!!!!

It's always darkest before the dawn.  So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

Henry Hawk

#2
November 23, 2011, 08:38:40 PM
Right back at you two....Happy T-Day!  :yes:
"The heart of the wise inclines to the right, but the heart of the fool to the left."
Ecclesiastes 10:2 - It all makes sense to me now...


"The future ain't what it used to be."– Yogi Berra

"Square roots are rarely found on any plant." FTW

Locutus

#3
November 23, 2011, 08:46:45 PM
One of the gravest dangers to the survival of our republic is an ignorant electorate routinely feeding at the trough of propaganda.   -- Locutus

"We are all connected; To each other, biologically. To the earth, chemically. To the rest of the universe atomically."  -- Dr. Neil deGrasse Tyson

Palehorse

#4
November 24, 2011, 09:23:25 AM
 :turk:        :rifle:         :fam:
R.I.P. - followsthewolf - You are MISSED! 4/17/2013

That which fails to kill me. . .should run!

Any "point" made by one that lacks credibility, is only as useful as toilet paper; and serves the same purpose. ~ Palehorse 4/22/2017

May you find charity when it is needed, and the ability to extend it when it is not. ~Palehorse 7/4/2012

To the last, I grapple with thee; From Hell's heart, I stab at thee; For hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee.~Herman Melville

followsthewolf

#5
November 24, 2011, 11:15:23 AM
*belch*

oops, sorry!!

Happy Thanksgiving!!
Ignorance and fanaticism are ravenous. They require constant feeding.

The Troll

#6
November 24, 2011, 11:39:28 AM

    :coffee:    :think:  Oh, by the Happy Thanksgiving day.  And may I wish.  That you may live and long as you want and never want as long as you live.  :peace:

Sandy Eggo

#7
November 24, 2011, 05:51:34 PM
Happy Thanksgiving my Zoner friends!
Only after the last tree has been cut down. Only after the last river has been poisoned. Only after the last fish has been caught. Only then will you find that money cannot be eaten. - -Cree Indian Prophecy

"Women who strive to be equal to men lack ambitition" -- anonymous

Palehorse

#8
November 24, 2011, 06:27:11 PM
Just got out of my first turkey coma. . . And am now awaiting the next one!  :icon_twisted:
R.I.P. - followsthewolf - You are MISSED! 4/17/2013

That which fails to kill me. . .should run!

Any "point" made by one that lacks credibility, is only as useful as toilet paper; and serves the same purpose. ~ Palehorse 4/22/2017

May you find charity when it is needed, and the ability to extend it when it is not. ~Palehorse 7/4/2012

To the last, I grapple with thee; From Hell's heart, I stab at thee; For hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee.~Herman Melville

Anne

#9
November 24, 2011, 08:39:08 PM
Quote from: The Troll on November 24, 2011, 11:39:28 AM
    :coffee:    :think:  Oh, by the Happy Thanksgiving day.  And may I wish.  That you may live and long as you want and never want as long as you live.  :peace:

A very proper Irish blessing. :)
"A discontented man will find no easy chair." Ben Franklin

The Troll

#10
November 24, 2011, 11:29:55 PM
Quote from: Anne on November 24, 2011, 08:39:08 PM
A very proper Irish blessing. :)


   :yes: :yes: :yes: :laugh:

Locutus

#11
November 25, 2011, 11:10:28 AM
Kudos to this lady for taking time to serve up meals to the less fortunate, even while still being partially incapacitated.  Kudos to Mark Kelly as well.

One of the gravest dangers to the survival of our republic is an ignorant electorate routinely feeding at the trough of propaganda.   -- Locutus

"We are all connected; To each other, biologically. To the earth, chemically. To the rest of the universe atomically."  -- Dr. Neil deGrasse Tyson

Palehorse

#12
November 25, 2011, 08:01:32 PM
I have to be thankful for Apple, and the fact I bought a Mac just shy of 4 years ago.

I encountered an issue with a hardware failure and made an appointment at the Genius Bar in Indpls to get it diagnosed and hopefully repaired today.

Not only are they going to fix it, but they are fixing it free of charge AND shipping it directly to my doorstep when it is done! No charge!  :eek: 8)

Try getting that kind of service with a 4 year old windows based machine! (Ain't happenin'! )
R.I.P. - followsthewolf - You are MISSED! 4/17/2013

That which fails to kill me. . .should run!

Any "point" made by one that lacks credibility, is only as useful as toilet paper; and serves the same purpose. ~ Palehorse 4/22/2017

May you find charity when it is needed, and the ability to extend it when it is not. ~Palehorse 7/4/2012

To the last, I grapple with thee; From Hell's heart, I stab at thee; For hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee.~Herman Melville

Henry Hawk

#13
November 25, 2011, 08:22:54 PM
That (a MAC) is next on my list of things obtain....my PC is on it's last leg, and I got it 5 years ago, but it has been running like crap for the last two.
"The heart of the wise inclines to the right, but the heart of the fool to the left."
Ecclesiastes 10:2 - It all makes sense to me now...


"The future ain't what it used to be."– Yogi Berra

"Square roots are rarely found on any plant." FTW

Palehorse

#14
November 25, 2011, 08:27:30 PM
Quote from: Henry Hawk on November 25, 2011, 08:22:54 PM
That (a MAC) is next on my list of things obtain....my PC is on it's last leg, and I got it 5 years ago, but it has been running like crap for the last two.

You know how I feel about Apple and Mac Henry. Yes, you spend a little more up front, but at the end of 4-5 years you aren't going to be spending it again! This is the first issue I have had with my Mac since I bought it. My wife has one too, (I am using it now), and we both couldn't be happier with them.

You truly get what you pay for! (And with a Mac you only pay for it once!)  :yes:
R.I.P. - followsthewolf - You are MISSED! 4/17/2013

That which fails to kill me. . .should run!

Any "point" made by one that lacks credibility, is only as useful as toilet paper; and serves the same purpose. ~ Palehorse 4/22/2017

May you find charity when it is needed, and the ability to extend it when it is not. ~Palehorse 7/4/2012

To the last, I grapple with thee; From Hell's heart, I stab at thee; For hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee.~Herman Melville
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