How did you raise your kids? Spoil them rotten?

[The Troll]

    The reason I ask this question is, in the last month over in Meijer's store,  I think the mothers were really wrong.  Now I know it's none of my business.  But here's what happen yesterday.

   A young mother with two children.  A boy about two years of age and a girl four going on five.   As soon as they entered the store, the girl started screaming the way little girls can.  Picking up everything and her mother putting them back.   Screaming that she wanted this and that and when her mother said no she screamed and cried.   The blond headed little boy just sat quietly in the cart sucking on a sucker.

   This went on for at least forty minutes.  When the mother went to checkout.  The girl decides she doesn't want to go home.  As we were leaving the store, the girl was laying on the floor, in the middle of the aisle, looking like she's was making snow angels and screaming at the top of her voice.  Her mother acted like nothing was happening.  Your kid?

   Last month a mother with three kid came in.  One girl about 2, a boy about 3 and and a boy about 4 to 5 years old.

   The older boy was just a little asshole.  He was into every thing.  Hitting the other two kids and just a pain in the ass.  Finally he made one of the younger kid cry.

   His mother grabbed him by his arm and said, "Jason, if you don't quite, I'm going to add 5 minutes on you nap.

   Did you spoil you kids rotten?

[Anne]

Well, I don't think so, but that is my opinion. There were a few times one of us would take one of the kids out of a restaurant when they were disruptive but it didn't happen often. Most of my grandchildren are well behaved, at least in public.  They all have their moments. What about yours?

[pariann]

You know......bobber......you can't beat your kids any more.  So what are you going to do?  Try being a parent of a smaller child in this century.

[Palehorse]

Exactly what I was going to say Pari.

The situations described certainly warrant a good beating, but administering it within a public venue would surely result in some idiot over reacting and calling the authorities on the parent. Leading to hours of interrogation, intense investigative efforts, and possibly the removal of the child(ren) once the children are interviewed and express their contempt for the parent over not being allowed to do whatever they damned well please.

My parents would have taken a switch or razor strap to my ass over such behavior, and while this would result in child abuse allegations today, it sure kept us kids in line and prevented repeat performances. And none of us turned out to be serial killers, rapists, etc.

My kids got the belt when they really screwed up; and because of it they rarely screwed up enough to get it.

Much like the workplace environment these days, the tail is wagging the dog. I'd hate to have to raise a child in today's world!

[The Troll]

You know......bobber......you can't beat your kids any more.  So what are you going to do?  Try being a parent of a smaller child in this century.

                                            

[pariann]

[The Troll]

                        

[The Troll]

Well, I don't think so, but that is my opinion. There were a few times one of us would take one of the kids out of a restaurant when they were disruptive but it didn't happen often. Most of my grandchildren are well behaved, at least in public.  They all have their moments. What about yours?

  Only had one, a boy.  We did three main things.  For one thing, my wife and I work as a team on him.  We didn't let him use us, one against the other.

   One thing I really enjoyed doing at the store was.  It was to let him let into something he wasn't suppost to.  I'd sneak up behind him and with hard flick of my finger on the back of his head. In fact no to long ago, my 47 year old son mentioned about the dreaded FINGER FLICK.

  Number 2, I called, the hand crush.  Very quiet and very good at getting a point over.  When he throwing a fit.  I'd just grab his hand and crush and say under my breath.  "I'll give you something to cry over."  One day we were having a little go round in the store and I was crushing his hand.  When this little old lady stopped and looked at us, while he was jumping up and down, while I was crushing his hand.  I told her that at times he got completely out of control.

   You know after all of the crushing, there were no bruises and no broken fingers.  In fact he does all the the shopping for his family, because he enjoys it.

  One other thing we did.  When he got old enough to get down to walk, while we shopped, he got to running off.  Well, this time, he ran off and we hid from him, keeping an eye on him.  All of a sudden he looked around and we weren't there.  He looked and looked for and all of a sudden was alone.  Well, he started crying and just then we walk around the corner, he lite up smiled, came running and we never had him run off again.  He stuck to us like glue.  For all of you people who don't like the Troll.  You know what you can do.

The Troll

[Sandy Eggo]

My kids have always been well behaved in public. My son, tried the temper tantrum bit, once, b/c he witnessed his cousin successfully pulling the same trick on his mother. I kept walking, but watched him out of the corner of my eye. When he saw that I wasn't reacting, he got up, brushed himself off and never tried that again. My daughter was a little more determined, especially when she went through her terrible twos. We took many trips to the bathrooms of stores for a booty swat. It was the only way to get her attention, so that she'd calm down enough that I could reason with her. I never reward bad behavior w/giving in and I stay consistent w/my expectations.

[Bo D]

There are things that a civilized person just shouldn't do in public. One of those things is to beat a child. Reserve your beatings for when you are in a private place. (I'm only half kidding here.)

My girls still laugh when they remember "the look."

If they even hinted at misbehaving in public, I would give them the evil eye. And they knew that if they didn't behave after that, they would be quickly escorted to a private place for a spanking. Spankings were extremely rare.

[Sandy Eggo]

Exactly! "The look" is an excellent tool.

My kids will say, "then I looked over and mom was giving me 'the look' and I just knew I was in big trouble"

[me]

Not only did I have "the look" they all knew if my voice was calm and I spoke slowly and used their middle names they had better straighten up because mom had reached the boiling point.  I never had a problem with them in public, even in the grocery store, because if they were told no they couldn't have something they knew throwing a fit and crying wasn't going to get it for them there anymore than it got them their way at home.

[Anne]

Oh, I knew when my mom said my middle name, especially when she had the "look" in her eye.

I never remember having to take my kids out of any place after they were about three, but one time I remember vividly was when our son was about 2 1/2 we were uptown and I was getting some Christmas stuff our of layaway and I had him in a harness and he decided to throw a temper tantrum because I wouldn't let him go run. He laid down on the floor and I just stood in line (I had already been there 30 minutes) and pulled him along on the floor behind me trying to pretned I didn't have a screaming child attached to me. After awhile he gave up and came a stood quietly beside me and he never did it again. We also used the smacked hand (when they were little) and a swat on the butt when they were older.