Homework

[BEG]

Oh I know FTW.
Plus my counselor told me to take my time since I'm also grieving my mother's death from December. I got kind of a double whammy.

I have good days and bad days. I think I'm doing okay as long as I keep functioning ie. working, cooking, cleaning, laundry, and posting on the computer most of all - LOL. 

[followsthewolf]

Dang, girl.

Lots on your plate.

But you're doing the right things while letting the healing take place.

And it is taking place.

[~Daisy~]

Good job on both of those triumphs, BEG!! I'm proud of you!

[BEG]

[Fatcats Mom]

BEG, I'm going to put this out here because I want you to know, you are not alone. I to am working in counciling on my self worth. And I am so proud of what you have accomplished. You have grabbed the ball and ran like hell.

I applaud you my friend.......It takes guts, and you have already proved you got em!  Hang tough my friend!

[BEG]

Thank you soo much FCM. 
I'm happy to hear I have a 'team mate'. Someone I can bounce things off of and you can do likewise. 
Sometimes I feel like nothing can stop me, then I get tripped up and I take a step back and then have to start again. 
I know WE can get through our situations and feel like we are in the exact place we should be in and let the future happen. At least that's my outlok for today - LOL. 

[Fatcats Mom]

Bounce anytime you wish, I'll do the same.

We will trip alot through out all of this, the great thing is........We are learning to catch ourselves!

[Sunny]

I, personally, am a supporter of anyone & everyone obtaining counseling (including counselors themselves).

BEG, did I ever tell you about the "A Mother Loss Workbook, Healing Exercises for Daughters"? If not, it's written by Diane Hambrook, C.S.W., M.S.W., and Gail Eisenburg with Herma M. Rosenthal.

I bought it in January after my Mother died...and am slowly working thru it. I haven't been very adament about it, but need to because I have bad days too.

[BEG]

No you haven't Sunny. I will look for it in the library later this week. 

I'm glad to read that you are moving through your grief too, Sunny. I know we are all different, but grief is greif, and always hurts. 

[Sunny]

Thanks, BEG...it believe it helped that I actually started grieving during the last year of her life.

Do you think that makes a difference? I find it's harder to lose somebody unexpectantly or suddenly.

My mother was diagnosed with Cancer 2 years & we knew it wasn't curable...so, it gave me time to prepare.

But, you're right...everyone heals in their own way and with time...

[Fatcats Mom]

Thanks, BEG...it believe it helped that I actually started grieving during the last year of her life.

Do you think that makes a difference? I find it's harder to lose somebody unexpectantly or suddenly.

My mother was diagnosed with Cancer 2 years & we knew it wasn't curable...so, it gave me time to prepare.

But, you're right...everyone heals in their own way and with time...

Sunny your right about being able to prepare. I lost my father to ALS, being able to prepare and watch him come to peace with it the way he did was a gift.

But to lose a person you hold so dear, is never easy. The yearning for that person is the hardest thing ever to heal. But with time, we learn how. I find memories and sharing those memories helped me to get through.

[BEG]

I'm not sure if there is an easy way to lose someone.
My mom's doctor never diagnosed her with a heart condition, but she died from a massive heart attack. She was gone before she hit the floor. 
While it was rough on all of her loved ones, I beleive it was the best way for her.
She always said she wanted to go quickly when her time was up.
Looking back, I am grateful that I didn't see her suffer with cancer (which is always how I imagined her life ending); even though I know I would have had more time with her.
I've learned to accept that this was best for her and now she is in a much better place.

[~Daisy~]

You've been very strong, BEG. I am not as close to my mom as my sister is (we are very different people) but I love her nonetheless, and I know I'll fall apart the day I have to face this.

[Sunny]

You've been very strong, BEG. I am not as close to my mom as my sister is (we are very different people) but I love her nonetheless, and I know I'll fall apart the day I have to face this.

In my experience, Daisy...the healing process can be just as challenging for those whom aren't close to the loved one. Sometimes you also grieve the rleationship that you did NOT have with them.

But, it's all about mental preparation, saying what you have to say NOW, and a matter of perspective. Everyone will have their day to shine...it's only an issue of time. 

[cachegurl]

You've been very strong, BEG. I am not as close to my mom as my sister is (we are very different people) but I love her nonetheless, and I know I'll fall apart the day I have to face this.

In my experience, Daisy...the healing process can be just as challenging for those whom aren't close to the loved one. Sometimes you also grieve the rleationship that you did NOT have with them.

But, it's all about mental preparation, saying what you have to say NOW, and a matter of perspective. Everyone will have their day to shine...it's only an issue of time.  

That is so true, Sunny. I think that is the big problem I have with my Dad's death. We were not really close and there were some family issues there, but nevertheless, he was my Dad and I still loved him no matter what. I do wish we would have had a better relationship and wish I would have gotten to say a few things to him to clear the air before he died but I didn't get that chance and won't now. He was sitting at a table talking to my Mom and my Uncle and just quit talking. He had cardiac arrest and his heart just stopped. They tried doing CPR, but couldn't. He was on life support in a coma for 3 days before the family decided to remove him from it because he had no brain activity. He never woke up the whole time he was in the hospital. I often think maybe this wouldn't be so hard if I had gotten to talk to him before he died, but would it really be easier? I now look at all of my relationships differently since he died.
BEG, I know exactly how you feel about the death of a parent. If you ever need someone to talk to or just vent to, I'm here. I have a friend that allows me to do that with her and it really helps sometimes. You're doing great, by the way!! Congrats!