I went back and read some of the posts that FTW left us.......some are hilarious and some are very witty.
He could have written a book....
my tribute to him....
Re: Male urination etiquette
« on: September 21, 2006, 04:59:38 PM »
1. If ya shake it more 'n twice, yer playin' with it.
2. No talking at the urinal. Women talk while pi$$ing and crapping. Men don't.
3. If you must talk, say hello at the wash basin. Assuming you wash your hands at all. Maybe you don't pi$$ on your hands, so you don't have to wash. In that case, skip the small talk and get the hell out.
4. No bitching about any smells. Ya didn't go in there to make perfume, fer crissake.
Nothing ain't worth nothing if it ain't free.
Dying is a state of mind.
I see walking corpses every day.
No spark, no fun, no real life.
Waiting for Godot.
I'm enjoying my time here. When I'm gone, I'm gone.
Let the wind take me away. Dust.
On quitting smoking...
Careful you don't substitute one addiction for another.
Keep suckin' air when it gets tough.
Believe me, if I could quit, you certainly can.
Quitting is a marathon. Run it one step at a time.
Next time you're dining solo, imagine the other diners naked. You'll either laugh your butt off or gag on your food.
Fishing for a compliment is sometimes good for the soul.
Never bothers me when people have their own views of the universe, supreme beings, life and death, etc.
When they live their lives according to the precepts of their beliefs and become examples of their faith, I admire them greatly.
It is when the evangelists try to save me from myself that I become irritated. Do they think they are the only ones who have contemplated mankind's role in the universe? Some of us have been doing that for a long time.
And keep your religion out of my government. If you need a reason, take a look at religion-controlled governments in the Middle East. A little religion leads to a little more, a little more, and soon the zealots are stoning and beheading people. Want a little closer look? Look at Salem, Mass. and the stoning of witches.
Religions sometimes get lost among human desires.
This is great, Hank. Thanks very much for doing this.
Did you know that he was a teacher? There is no more noble profession - except for nurses and police officers.
Saw Janis in concert (that'll tell you how old I am). She came out on stage with a bottle of Southern Comfort and said she didn't give a damn what anybody said, she was going to sing until either the bottle gave up or she passed out. She proceed to rip everyone apart emotionally with her songs for about 3 hours . At which time the bottle was empty. She staggered off the stage to a thunderous, screaming standing ovation.
Will never forget that night as long as I live.
Quote from: Bo D on May 08, 2013, 12:38:51 PM
This is great, Hank. Thanks very much for doing this.
Did you know that he was a teacher? There is no more noble profession - except for nurses and police officers.
Yep, I knew it...and the more I read back through his posts.....it becomes more obvious....HE LOVED TO TEACH.
I love this one.. ;D
Is "bad vice" inherantly redundant?
Is a "good vice" an oxymoron?
Do these questions mean anything at all?
Why do I ask such things?
All's well if your end's well....I guess.
Trees are highly underrated.
Near beer sucks.
More to come.... :yes:
If you're an a$$hole drunk, it is not that the alcohol made you that way, it's because that's what you were before you got drunk.
Bustin' Willie Nelson for drugs is like shootin' fish in a barrel.
And nothing says "REAL MAN" like a grandfather's love ....
Morning. I'm being drooled on by a baby at the moment. Sugar drops.
Sometimes he made me laugh so hard I farted.
"I chased her around the church and grabbed her by the organ"
;D
I smote a smite (http://theunknownzone.dailynuisanceproductions.com/index.php?action=profile;u=14;area=showposts;start=7125#) into the air.
It fell to earth on someone there.
And hard and cold the reply, I note
In whose vicinity I smote.
Quiet wisdom ....
Never know where a thread is going to go when you create it.
Sort of like a child.
Square roots are rarely found on any plant.
Quote from: Henry Hawk on May 08, 2013, 02:07:13 PM
Square roots are rarely found on any plant.
:biggrin:
This thread is making me smile in remembrance. :yes:
Quote from: followsthewolf on September 24, 2006, 02:35:50 PM
I am being a smart-ass. I apologize. Sometimes the voices overpower me. :jester:
:biggrin:
So very sad that his voice has fallen silent. :(
Quote from: Locutus on May 09, 2013, 01:08:12 AM
So very sad that his voice has fallen silent. :(
Ah but it hasn't. Not when we have a treasure trove of his postings to quote for as long as they don't age off! :smile:
True words Palehorse! True words!
I've been meaning to do a post review myself to pick out my favorites, but just haven't had a chance yet. Maybe this weekend.
We can't conceive of infinity.
As soon as we define it in our minds, we have given it boundaries.
And it is no longer infinite.
This is classic FTW; challenging you to use your damn brain!
When I was about 12, I was in a group of "big guys" (must have been 16 and 17 year olds). One of the guys told this joke:
Q: What happened when the girl backed into the airplane propeller?
A: Disaster
Most of the guys laughed like crazy, and so did I, even though I had not the slightest idea what it meant.
I didn't get it until years later. Now I'm not so sure the other older guys got it at the time, either. Probably didn't want to confess to a brain freeze, just like me.
We will be removing the sticky from this topic at some point on Tuesday since everyone has had a chance to see it and post. The thread will remain available on this board for reference or for additional comment if anyone so chooses.
Quote from: Palehorse on May 10, 2013, 11:01:15 AM
This is classic FTW; challenging you to use your damn brain!
When I was about 12, I was in a group of "big guys" (must have been 16 and 17 year olds). One of the guys told this joke:
Q: What happened when the girl backed into the airplane propeller?
A: Disaster
Most of the guys laughed like crazy, and so did I, even though I had not the slightest idea what it meant.
I didn't get it until years later. Now I'm not so sure the other older guys got it at the time, either. Probably didn't want to confess to a brain freeze, just like me.
I read that one too, and it cracked me up.... :biggrin:
This was in a thread about entitled "what's the best book you've ever read"
Quote from: followsthewolf on September 20, 2006, 07:35:29 PM
On the Road - Jack Kerouac
The key to opening up a side of life I could never have imagined.
Now I can't imagine having lived my life without having read it.
Think I'll add it to my reading list.
I'm laughing SO hard! Looking back at posts and the conversations we've had is killing me. ;D
WTH was I talking about? lol It got FTW's attention. ;D
Quote from: Sandy Eggo on September 22, 2006, 11:02:56 AM
I'm not understanding how faith in religion enhances sex and why it's being labled as "Christian" sex. Sex is sex and the hotter the better. IMHO. :wink:
Quote from: followsthewolf on September 22, 2006, 11:10:42 AM
:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:
I second, third, fourth, fifth.......(well, you get the picture) that.
Quote from: Sandy Eggo on May 19, 2013, 09:53:44 PM
I'm laughing SO hard! Looking back at posts and the conversations we've had is killing me. ;D
And that's exactly the way he would have wanted it. :yes:
I remember posting a joke I thought was hilarious, and Wolf wrote back that it was one of the funniest jokes he'd ever heard. Let's see if I can remember it.
A man was injured at work and was hospitalized. Was in terrible pain, according to his wife. After he was able to go home, he still had a lot of pain, which affected his every movement, but even so he managed to go to church one Sunday. His wife, the dear woman, got up and asked everybody to pray for him because he was in such terrible pain from injury to his scrotum that every movement caused pain, to the point he could not hug her or even hold his baby girl on his lap. There was dead silence -- and then he got up and slowly walked to the front of the church, turned around, and said, "My wife is mistaken. I didn't injure my scrotum. I broke my sternum."
Mozart - Requiem (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zi8vJ_lMxQI)
:'(
This one is for you Wolfie. (And if you are reading this, how about adding an extra foot or two to the total so we know you're listening / reading?)
Time tuh do muh SNOW dance! :snowbl: :snowbl: :snowbl: :snowbl: :snowbl: :snowbl: :snowbl: :snowbl:
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I didn't know him but went back and read his posts that others had posted that he said. All funny!
And yet another gem from the man I also still desperately miss here:
Quote from: followsthewolf on January 11, 2013, 09:40:46 AM
No problem.
The only requirement you left out was that no registered republican can own any sharp object.
That, of course, does not apply to their brains. . . . .which, as everyone knows already, are never sharp objects and cannot be honed.
Strangely as relevant today as it was when he wrote it! :biggrin:
:yes: :big grin:
Miss him too.
Yeah, I miss the heck out of him. He pm'd me quite often to make sure we were good with each other after a long day of quarreling.
He had a great heart! Was a first class act!
Quote from: Henry Hawk on March 30, 2015, 08:02:40 PM
Yeah, I miss the heck out of him. He pm'd me quite often to make sure we were good with each other after a long day of quarreling.
He had a great heart! Was a first class act!
Indeed Hank. My signature line continues to pay him tribute, as do many of us here. :yes:
We're coming up on the 2-year anniversary of his death here in April.
Quote from: Locutus on March 31, 2015, 05:40:07 PM
We're coming up on the 2-year anniversary of his death here in April.
Indeed. His adjustment period over there has long ended, and I believe he has likely got some solid visitations in by this time.
We can probably expect him to call upon us sometime soon, and put to rest the question surrounding what is next; if anything. . . :biggrin: