Ass Juice Tales

[Palehorse]

We all have them, and another topic that went off into the deep weeds has encouraged me to relate yet another one herein;

True story.

I recently went to a local quick change oil facility to have my truck serviced. I pulled in and they went to work immediately, so I walked into the waiting room and sat down. A grizzled and retired Army Veteran was there already, and we exchanged pleasantries as we passed the time waiting for our vehicles to be serviced.

In pulls a Buick into the third bay. I knew right away it had to be a blue hair and I was not disappointed. The owner waddled into the waiting room, dressed in khaki shorts and a weird safari styled shirt and wearing a floppy hat. He sat there burping and regurgitating his breakfast, and the guy at the counter called him up to get his information. Just before he called his name out he wiggled around a bit in his seat, and I recall thinking, Oh sweet Jeebus, don't let him fart too!.

He got up and sure enough, those khaki shorts had a great big old brown skid mark right in the crack of his 6. I noticed it right away and looked away immediately; right into the eyes of the grizzled old Army Vet, who busted out laughing. I of course could not hold back myself. We both just shook our heads. . . And it was then that I glanced over at the hard plastic surfaced chair he had arisen from; and its surface was glistening with juices emitted from this guys sphincter. Thankfully I didn't smell a thing. . .

The guy had completed providing his info to the worker, but before he could get back to the seating area a young couple came in and the girl, wearing a really snug fitting pair of light colored Under Armor shorts sat right down in that chair without looking. Army guy's eyes got as big as saucers, Bluehair sat in another chair, and the guy behind the counter called my name.

The worker must have thought I was high or something, because I could not wipe the grin off my face as I swiped my debit card and was awaiting my receipt printing out on those damned old printers they have in those places. I got into my truck and laughed so hard I had tears running down my cheeks.

2 chairs with ass juice emitted by the same guy, and one young girl with a shart stain on her tight fitting shorts that did not come from her own ass! 

You cannot make this shit up folks! 

[me]

Sounds like it was a good thing they got you out of there quickly. I will from this day forward always look before I sit. 

[libby]

  First time I've laughed out loud in quite a while.

[Purplelady1040]

Hahahaa

[Exterminator]

http://www.ihos.com/steakhouse.html

[me]

http://www.ihos.com/steakhouse.html

[libby]

Ex, I am the kind of woman considered refined.  I am also, have always been shy, bookish, reserved. But, I also have a good sense of humor, and most important of all -- regarding what you just posted -- a vivid imagination.

So, here I sat, alone, reading it, at first a little offended, but then, as I kept reading, imagination kicked in, and once or twice I could not see because I was laughing so hard the tears were rolling down my cheeks. 

[Exterminator]

 

[Purplelady1040]

http://www.ihos.com/steakhouse.html

I was sitting in a class while reading this. I almost laughed until I cried. Lol

[Palehorse]

http://www.ihos.com/steakhouse.html

[duke jupiter]

We all have them, and another topic that went off into the deep weeds has encouraged me to relate yet another one herein;

True story.

I recently went to a local quick change oil facility to have my truck serviced. I pulled in and they went to work immediately, so I walked into the waiting room and sat down. A grizzled and retired Army Veteran was there already, and we exchanged pleasantries as we passed the time waiting for our vehicles to be serviced.

In pulls a Buick into the third bay. I knew right away it had to be a blue hair and I was not disappointed. The owner waddled into the waiting room, dressed in khaki shorts and a weird safari styled shirt and wearing a floppy hat. He sat there burping and regurgitating his breakfast, and the guy at the counter called him up to get his information. Just before he called his name out he wiggled around a bit in his seat, and I recall thinking, Oh sweet Jeebus, don't let him fart too!.

He got up and sure enough, those khaki shorts had a great big old brown skid mark right in the crack of his 6. I noticed it right away and looked away immediately; right into the eyes of the grizzled old Army Vet, who busted out laughing. I of course could not hold back myself. We both just shook our heads. . . And it was then that I glanced over at the hard plastic surfaced chair he had arisen from; and its surface was glistening with juices emitted from this guys sphincter. Thankfully I didn't smell a thing. . .

The guy had completed providing his info to the worker, but before he could get back to the seating area a young couple came in and the girl, wearing a really snug fitting pair of light colored Under Armor shorts sat right down in that chair without looking. Army guy's eyes got as big as saucers, Bluehair sat in another chair, and the guy behind the counter called my name.

The worker must have thought I was high or something, because I could not wipe the grin off my face as I swiped my debit card and was awaiting my receipt printing out on those damned old printers they have in those places. I got into my truck and laughed so hard I had tears running down my cheeks.

2 chairs with ass juice emitted by the same guy, and one young girl with a shart stain on her tight fitting shorts that did not come from her own ass! 

You cannot make this shit up folks! 

Anal leakage ain't a good thing. Heck imagine if the little feller had explosive diarrhea to go with it.

Best regards,

Duke (got me depends) Jupiter

[The Troll]

  This and some toilet paper sure would help a lot.  Think