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Obituary of the late Mr. Common Sense

Started by Henry Hawk, July 06, 2007, 11:25:39 AM

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Henry Hawk

Obituary of the late Mr. Common Sense

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend,
Common Sense, who has been with us for many years.
No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth
records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He
will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable
lessons as:

Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
Why the early bird gets the worm;
Life isn't always fair;
and Maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial
policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable
strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-
intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in
place. Reports of a 6 -year- old boy charged with sexual
harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended
from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a
teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only
worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked
teachers for doing the job that they themselves had
failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined
even further when schools were required to get parental
consent to administer Tylenol, sun lotion or a band-aid to
a student; but could not inform parents when a student
became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten
Commandments became contraband; churches became
businesses; and criminals received better treatment than
their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend
yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar
could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a
woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee
was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, while driving her
car, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents,
Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter,
Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights,
Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized
he was gone. 


"The heart of the wise inclines to the right, but the heart of the fool to the left."
Ecclesiastes 10:2 - It all makes sense to me now...


"The future ain't what it used to be."– Yogi Berra

"Square roots are rarely found on any plant." FTW

tallulahdahling

OMG!  That is right on.........ewww don't get me started........ :mad:
If you don't have anything nice to say then come over here and sit by me!