If you have any parenting advice here is the place to put it. :biggrin:
Just what Bill Cosby said:
"Bury them when they turn 13. Dig 'em up when they're 25 and sane again."
:biggrin: :biggrin:
When you have that out-of-control teen in which you have grounded him or her from anything you can think of and it does no good what do you do?
I mean the kind that get in your face,threaten to call the cops on you if you touch them,cuss you out,.....
Quote from: American_Woman on January 15, 2007, 07:47:20 PM
When you have that out-of-control teen in which you have grounded him or her from anything you can think of and it does no good what do you do?
I mean the kind that get in your face,threaten to call the cops on you if you touch them,cuss you out,.....
IMO....If you have a teen that has that much disrespect for you, it is too late....I don't think you can do anything at that point in time, except pray that they some how come to their sences...
Quote from: Henry Hawk on January 15, 2007, 09:20:32 PM
IMO....If you have a teen that has that much disrespect for you, it is too late....I don't think you can do anything at that point in time, except pray that they some how come to their sences...
I have a neighbor who is trying to figure out what to do with her daughter. The girl is 13 and OMG! If she was mine I'd be having the police and CPS called on me! She will get in her mothers face and scream at her,cuss,...it gets very bad. I don't allow them to come over anymore because my children are not going to be associated with that crap. She has slapped her mom acrossed the face,kicked her,pinched her,...I told her mom to call the damn police on her daughter,but she won't do it. She gets suspended for fighting and cussing out teachers. She is not lady like at all and to be honest I think the poor kid thinks she's a boy! She dresses like a boy,walks like a boy,talks like a boy,.... Me and her mother were talking one day on my front porch and her daughter came walking up. Her mother said "we're talking go find something to do,this is adult chat." She leaned over in her moms face and said "Make me leave b!tch!" So I said this is my house and you'll not talk to your mother like that here so the best thing for you to do is go back home. She said huh you ain't my mom so shut up. Next thing I know I jumped up and grabbed her by her arm and I got in her face and said wanna piss me off? WELL DO YOU?!? I was yelling and very pissed off by then. She said I was just kidden, I said well we do not kid around like that here and if you ever talk to me like that again you'll be missing some damn teeth and you can call the police,cps or GOD if you want now get your ass home! She left. Her mother got mad because I didn't let her handle it. I said look if you can't control here while you are here then I will do it and if you want to be mad the next time you want to talk use the phone so I don't have to listen to her shit. Well 3 weeks went by and nothing. Next thing I know cops are at her house. She comes running over to me talking about I hit my daughter. She pissed me off so bad I finally decked her. Well nothing came of it. Neither were in trouble. They pretty much said to her daughter you deserved it and to the mom get your kid under control because next time we have to come back one or both are going with us. It's all still the same over there.
There are several kids in my neighborhood who do not understand adults talking. What is with that? I have had to stop convertsation just because someone would not send their kid on somewhere while we were talking. You'd think they'd see mine aren't hanging around and well DUH there's a reason! When adults are talking about certain things children should not be present. These people don't seem to mind. :confused: >:(
I have to say excuse me but we are talking could you go play. Or Could you ask your son/daughter to go play while we chat? Grrr I have gotten to the point now where I don't chat much because people are ok with their kids hanging around. An example this chick was talking about her sisters boyfriend being on drugs,stealing,sexing up all these gals,...and her kid was right there so I said would you go play so we can talk and she said oh it's ok he hears it all the time. I said well I think it's wrong and you should go now. I've got things to do. What the hell is wrong with people? I mean the kid is like 8,9,10 years old and knows about a sexing up someone else,drug doing,stealing whatever he can Aunties boyfriend. :no:
Your neighbor lost control long, long, long ago.
She (along with whomever comes into contact with her daughter) is now paying the price for the mother's lack of or abdication from parenting skills.
She started, I'll bet, by failing to establish who was in charge.
I agree with FTW. It's always a tough call. She needs to know there are consequences for her actions, but I'm guessing mom doesn't bother with that. I also find myself about negative outside influences, friends or even her mom's friends.
I had a co-worker, who's son was about 15 years old and he looked 18 or 19. He was a tall kid w/a mustache at 15. He started hanging out w/older kids in the neighborhood or perhaps I should say "young adults". Anyway, she was suspicious that he was sneaking out at night. So one night, she got up and sure enough, he wasn't there. She waited for him w/the lights off and when he came home, she turned on the lights and confronted him. He was intoxicated. He preceded to do that posturing thing some guys do (chest butting) around his mom, while screaming and cursing at her. She said she stepped back once and told him to calm down and if he didn't she was going to knock him out. Well, he didn't and she did. The next day, he went to the school guidance counselor and told him that his mom had struck him. They put him in foster care. A few months later he wanted to go home very badly, but his mom kept failing the interview with the CPS agent. Apparently the question was, "will you hit him again?" and her response was, "if he gets in my face". After a year, she said the CPS agent said, "Look, I think he had learned his lesson and really wants to come home, but you've got to tell me that you won't hit him...just tell me that." So, she did and the boy did great once he got home.
A teacher living near my best friend has a daughter who is 8 and does the same thing. I blame the mother on this one and to be honest, she needs her kids (she also has 15 yr. old son) taken away from her. I don't know why they haven't been taken yet. I live in a very small town and everyone knows everything that goes on. A State Trooper lives next door and the Sheriffs Office is less than 75 yards away. The mom is a loser and doesn't want the little girl, sees her as a "thorn in her side". The dad is an alcoholic who is divorced from the mom, but still comes around to fight and argue with her when he is drunk...police are called, he is told to leave...nothing more. She drops the little girl off at the pool when it opens, leaves her with no money, the mom will leave and stay gone all day, never worrying about the little girl having anything to eat. No supervision except for what the lifeguards give while she is there. The only thing the girl has going for her on those days is that in this town, some of the businesses donate money to the pool to be used to feed kids that don't have any money to eat with. The little girl is in a horrible shape. She cusses, calls her mom every name known, destroys things, steals, uses the bathroom in the floor when she gets mad...it's awful. It's the mom's fault because she hasn't raised this little girl. She is just there. My best friends daughter is 12 and she tries to be a friend to her. She tries to teach her things, things that the mom should be teaching her (bathing, how to clean herself, talked with her about her upcoming period and how to "take care of yourself" during that time"). The mom recently told my friend that she is going to have her daughter start seeing a therapist. I was YAYYYY. Maybe now, someone can talk to this little girl and get the info they need to get her some help. I am hoping the little girl feels comfortable enough with the counselor to tell her what has been going on and how she is being raised. CPS has been called, but they don't see anything reported as being abuse (they are fed, clothed, have a roof over head and no physical abuse). The mom has a boyfriend and will leave the little girl with whoever she can find to keep her. When she leaves, the little girl is in the road, screaming, cussing, throwing a fit...when the mom comes home, the little girl will ask her...well, did you get you some d*ck...the mom will smile and say "yeah, and it was good". It's really a sad case. this little girl is screaming for help. She does what she does because she has no mom, not in the sense a mom should be. As for the son, he does what he can to help take care of her, but this is a big burden on him too...she won't listen to him and he can't do anything with her. He has his own issues, but he is nothing like this. In his case, he gets frustrated and will sit and cry, pulling his hair or throwing things. IMO she is destroying these kids with her neglect. I just pray that when this little girl does talk with a counselor, she let's everything be known. It's easier when the abused tells it... reporting something like this, it's hard to prove abuse.
My heart is breaking for those kids.