He has colon cancer at age 35. Spots on liver, and a few tiny spots on his lungs. Dr. suspects it is genetic, so genetic dna testing is being performed. If it is, he will receive immunotherapy. Otherwise he will get standard chemo. We are circling the wagons, and preparing for battle.
Sorry to hear that. Will be keeping him in my thoughts and prayers.
Thoughts a prayers 442. Miracles do happen. I am praying that several are sent your way.
Two chemo treatments in, the tumor in the liver has grown slightly, but in the center there is evidence of the tumor dying. He is bloated in the stomach, and his legs are huge from water retention. The side effects are worse than the damn cancer.
Chemo #4 in the books last Tuesday. Getting them every two weeks. Today was not a good day, tired and weak. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. Trying real hard to be positive, but days like today make it tough.
Praying things are looking better for you and him today.
As of chemo #5, things were looking better. His cancer factor had dropped from 700+, to 350. Still way too high, but at least coming down. We go Tuesday (yesterday) for #6, but it wasn't to be. His white cell count was right at 1, and his bilirubin was above 30. Essentially his liver is failing faster than we can get rid of the cancer. While he seemed about the same as he had been for a few days, by Tuesday he was struggling. It was a noticeable difference over just a few days.
Hospice has been called, so here we sit waiting on the inevitable. His ex brought the boys for a visit. They are 7 and 4, he told them what the deal was. They knew he was very sick, but knew the doctor was working on making him better. Now they know that their dad isn't going to make it. He didn't want them to be blindsided, so he told them.
This whole deal was like jumping into a 50 lap race, already 10 laps down. While not impossible to get into the lead, it was improbable. Had he known something was amiss this time last year, it would have been relatively easy to beat it. Sadly he didn't have any outward symptoms until it was too late. Besides, 35 year olds don't have colon cancer, they are too young. Seems like as of late, the doctors are seeing a lot of people in their mid 30's having problems.
On a good note, Mike has a friend who had been putting off a colonoscopy for some time. This triggered him to go ahead and get it done. They found three pre cancerous polyps, and removed them. He sent Mike a note, thanking him for saving his life. Our oldest son, age 38, had a colonoscopy last week, and they removed 1 pre cancerous polyp from him as well, likely saving him from a fate similar to his brother. Mike felt a little better knowing that something good came out of this.
We are definitely gonna miss him, as he is somewhat of a character at times. Going to the dragstrip will never be the same without him, but I'll give it my best to honor him when I do. We'll most likely have his boys along so they can see dad's cars race.
We'll be keeping his Gold Fairlane, and his high school car the 85 Cutlass for the boys. I will race either one from time to time and keep them exercised as he wishes. His 75 Ford F-250 highboy truck restoration project will go to his brother Greg to be finished, and I'll inherit his 96 Ford dualy. I'll sell my truck, since I won't need two. Gonna have to put up a building, but we will do what is necessary.
This really sucks, and is in no way what I wanted for him or the boys. I'd trade places with Mike in a flash if I could. Parents are not suppose to bury their children.
So very very sorry to read this news 442. It is like hitting a brick wall doing 110mph. I know.
You are absolutely right, parents should never have to bury their children; and yet it happens.
You raised a good man, and one you have shared several passions with. And your plans ensure those same passions will have the opportunity to germinate within his children with you teaching them just as you did him. And rest assured that your son will be there as well, watching, smiling, and wishing he could tell you how proud he is of you. And them.
And if you reach a point where you miss him beyond what you can stand, go off by yourself somewhere away from others, and talk to him. Say his name and he will be there. And after the emotions settle down, be still and listen, observe. He will send you a sign that you will recognize. But you can't think about what it will be, or could be. You'll know it when you see or hear it. And you will feel him there.
Long road between to travel though. And lots of soul wrenching pain to deal with. You need help with that reach out man. Please. I'll make time to listen and do whatever I can to help you through it.
In the interim, my thoughts and prayers will be for your son, and your entire family.
Thank you Palehorse, your words carry wisdom and caring.
This has been the third day he hasn't gotten up, or eaten. He is shutting down, and it is hell to watch. His mother and I are wore to the bone, but we continue our vigil. His brother will be back on Wednesday evening after work.
😭
😭
Mike passed away today at approximately 12:30 pm. He went peacefully while we (myself, his mother, and older brother) were attending to him. It was like he ran out of gas and just coasted to a stop. Although we take comfort in knowing his struggles are through, he leaves one huge hole in our hearts. His two sons, age 4 and 7, took it hard as was to be expected, as did the rest of us. We go tomorrow and make the final arrangements for his funeral service sometime next week.
The outpouring of love from so many has completely blown us away. He touched so many in good ways, we had no true idea until now. We are so proud.
My deepest and most heartfelt condolences go out to all of you. Reach out if you need to brother. Please.
Prayers and condolences to you and the family.
https://www.fristfuneralhome.com/obits/obituary.php?id=685584
Dude, given the restrictions around the headcount I will forego attending in deference to family and loved ones. They need to be there to support you and each other. However, please know you and your family remain in my thoughts and prayers and reach out if you need to.
I am in Boone county daily, Sunday through Thursday every week if you need to talk, scream, or just do some talking about things. I promise a sympathetic ear and shoulder to cry on when needed.
PH, thank you very much, I sure appreciate it.
What a ride this has been, good times and sad times, and one hell of a trip down memory lane. Three months of moving his *stuff from his house to ours finally came to an end a couple weeks ago. Of course our house and garage are jam packed to the point of bursting. Our garage addition should begin soon, but not soon enough. Once it is complete we will be moving and storing all automotive items to it, leaving room in the current garage for his, and some of ours, *stuff. As *stuff is relocated, it will be sorted and tagged as needed. Unwanted *stuff will find a new home of one type or the other.
*Stuff, a word describing too much of anything which may or may not have obvious value. See also crap, and bullshit for further explanation.
Oh man 442. Been there with my fathers stuff. The tears, laughs, and flood of memories were unexpected and astounding. A lot of reset the grief process to start. Some of it several times.
I found one thing among all the stuff, that provided me with a wealth of good memories. And while I placed all the other stuff into an organized place, that one thing I placed into a prominent location that I walk by every single day at least once. The man cave. (Aka the garage).
That one thing is a 1963 5 hp Johnson Seahorse outboard motor. And while it provides me a soulful smile each and every day, it still has not resurrected the absolute obsession I held for fishing in the 21 years since his passing. I just can't bring myself to do it anymore because the numerous times I've tried all I can do is miss him and I end up a blubbering man-girl over it.
But that daily soulful smile is something I look forward to every single day. Because it puts him squarely into my minds eye in a state wherein he and I shared a common ground. He taught me to fish and I in turn eventually taught him modern approaches and theory to the endeavor. And just as I was an astute pupil in the beginning, so was he until the end.
I hope you can find your special item to provide you the same within the cornucopia of stuff you've obtained. It is amazing to have let me tell you.
To say it's been a while since I've checked in, would be an understatement. This past year has been one wild roller coaster ride to say the least. Emotions have been all over the place, some good, some not so good, but we have endured. PH, we do have a few things out in places of prominence, while there is a lot still out that needs to be dealt with. We have added on to the garage so we have more working space, and the original part can absorb some of the overload from our son. Delays in getting it built delayed a full move in, but at least it was weather tight before winter hit. The next paragraph will explain more delays as well.
I ended up with some serious prostate issues that came to a head the first of December, which required surgery the end of January. The time in between was bladder healing time, while catheters were the theme of the day to keep me going. Now I can urinate again, and kidney function has returned to normal. It was kind of scary for a little bit.
Happy. No. Damned happy to hear from yah dude!
I was getting concerned but now I read (see) why you've been scarce. Also happy to see you've beat the challenge! Well done sir!
These things take time , and everyone is different. And the process is something no one is comfortable with; nor should they be. Ever.
Sounds like you're navigating your own process extremely well brother. Stay the course! And remember the journey is yours, and only you can determine where you are, and where you need to go. In your time and no one else's.
Keep checking in man, and as always, if I can help in any way just let me know man. Always happy to lend a hand, and ear, or a shoulder to cry on. Always!