I was talking to a very good friend on the phone last night who is currently separated from her husband (also, a good friend of ours). And after five years of marriage, they have agreed that they are no longer the people they were when they met (nor should they be); however, when I talked to my friend about my perception, it seemed as if she has lost all sense of "SELF", and what makes "HER" happy.
This often occurs in any relationship...we become so devoted or committed to it, we often give up parts of ourself, THINKING that's what the relationship needs to thrive. But, in the end, we just lose out.
So, I am borrowing this From Oprah. This month's challenge is for each of us to identify "what makes us purr".
"From the sporty (soccer) to the sexy (little kisses on the neck) to the small but magnificent (steamy showers, homemade whipped cream, throwing things out), O, The Oprah Magazine and Oprah.com created "bliss lists."
Create your own!
What's on YOUR Bliss list? Create a list of all those favorite things in your life that bring you joy. Hang it up in a place you see often for when you need a little pick-me-up or reminder that you are an individual & to give back to yourself!
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Great ideas!
I actually considered not coming home this past weekend. Yes, I threaten that a lot, but I truly contemplated it this time. I live here in Indiana because its convenient for my husband. His freight and business partners are here. I could pick up and go anywhere. I don't want to do what I do for a living, particularly, since I'd prefer to hang it all up and become a reclusive writer. I almost decided to do it.
But, for now...I'm biding my time.
Very cool, Daisy....but, until the time is right for the whole family (and there WILL be a right time)...make sure you continue to write...you do it well.
Thank you :smile:
That is definitely on my "bliss list." To be able to hermit myself into a cabin in nature and not come out until my book is perfect.
When that day arrives, just remember who your forum friends were. :wink:
Of course!!!
I was thrilled to find out that Aaron's cousin's husband is also a writer. Aaron has so much respect for Michael, that when he found out what he actually does for a living (in addition to helping handle family affairs when the Diplomat is overseas) that Aaron finally was supportive of my dream! (Before, I think he thought I'd be some poor, struggling wannabe.)
Bliss list?
1.) A jug of Absolut Red
2.) Annuder jug of Absolut Red
3.) Sum fresh limes
4.) OSU vs SC on da tube
5.) Okay, okay . . . mebbe annuder jug of Absolut Red
BLISS!
Digging this one back up, too. I currently have 7 couples friends that are going through divorce...yes, that totals 14 people contributing to that 50+% divorce rate in my immediate social circle! Very disturbing. What I've identified as a very common thread amongst many of these friends is that one, if not both, inevitably feels as if they've lost their own identity or independence. That's sad!
So, I challenge everyone to sit down every once in awhile (single, involved, married, or otherwise) and identify their "BLISS LIST". What makes you truly happy? What have you done for yourself lately?
Although I may be dissed for making this sort of remark, I'll go ahead and make it anyway. I'm fairly certain that we humans aren't necessarily wired to be monogamous. I just don't think it's there biologically. It might be a "feel good" for all of us to think that we can find someone who we can spend the rest of our lives with; I'm just not so sure we're predisposed in that direction by nature.
Just musing. Never mind me. ;D
Muse away, Locutus...besides, I venture to guess you're not alone in your views.
Here's an interesting article that differentiates between social monogamy & sexual monogamy ("Are Humans Meant to be Monogamous?"):
http://www.lifeslittlemysteries.com/are-humans-meant-to-be-monogamous-0297/
An excerpt from the article which shows that Loc has statistical support:
QuoteOnly 3 percent to 5 percent of the roughly 5,000 species of mammals (including humans) are known to form lifelong, monogamous bonds, with the loyal superstars including beavers, wolves and some bats.
Interesting article Sunny. Thanks for posting that.
:smile: You're welcome. :smile:
Boy, is this still relevant. I can sadly add at least 3 more 'couple' friends to the "D-LIST" since this thread started six+ years ago. In fact, that d-word has surfaced several times in my own house over the recent years.
So, I will share a few things that are on my personal bliss list:
#1 exploring new places with my daughters
#2 antique shops
#3 my little 31 business
#4 talking with friends
#5 sitting on the beach and looking for beachglass
What makes you happy?
1. Husband
2 . Kids- which I am grateful that they are healthy after having a friend whose baby is sick.
3. Good friends
4. Beach
5. Counted cross stitching
Bless list.
My wife.
My Son.
My cat.
My brand new Ford F-150 four door Eco-boost pick-up. It's ruby red and it's aluminum and it sings. :music1: There ain't no rust on me. :music1: There ain't no rust on me. :music1: I'm telling mugs that there is no rust on me. :music1: Yes, I'm aluminum and there will be no rust on me. :music1: :yes: :yes: :yes: :biggrin:
My list:
My family,most of them anyway.
My friends.
Sunny days.
Needlework.
Reading.
I have been married a long time and most of our friends have been meat least 35 years. We have all kinds of different interests and lifestyles. The one thing we do seem to have in common is not being joined at the hip with our husband/wife.